This one goes out to all you awesome mamas out there!
Welcome everybody to The Tuesday Night Cigar Club episode 166! It’s our first ever Mother’s Day Love-Your-Mama-With-Everything-You’ve-Got Spectacular Bonunzo! Sorry, that should have been, Bonanza! No no… sadly we got drunk as usual and completely missed Mother’s Day so this will just be a random very weird episode of the podcast, the one podcast that always leaves you with something to latch on to, errr, something to think about! I’ll admit it, sometimes I program a podcast just strictly to fuck with Tut… and here we are.
THE CIGAR – SERIE GRAN RESERVA 1988 by WARPED CIGARS
Size: 5.25 x 50
Wrapper: Nicaraguan Shade Grown Jalapa Corojo ‘99
Binder: Nicaragua
Filler: Nicaragua Corojo ’99 & Criollo ‘98
Price: $10.75 (the TNCC obtained tonight’s cigar from the one and only Famous Smoke Shop and you can go right now to FamousSmokeShop.com and grab a box on sale and then on top of that use promo code TNCC20 to get an additional $20 off!)
“Serie Gran Reserva 1988 is dedicated to the birth year of our founder, the cigar was a milestone cigar and took years to develop before he was accepting of the blend bearing his birth year. A classic vitola size and 95 rated by Cigar Aficionado, it truly is something special.” So a Warped 80’s cigar paired with a truly warped 80’s film, that my friends is why I get paid the big bucks! Well, not really but that’s one of many reasons why, in a perfect world, I should get paid the big bucks…
The medium brown wrapper smells great and it has a smooth leathery texture to it that’s devoid of any surface oils. The cold draw reveals some dark fruit sweetness and a hint of milk chocolate. Upon torching the foot, that milk chocolate note (reminiscent of Nestle’s Quik powder) presents itself on the draw immediately. Up top, a nonaggressive white pepper arrives via the retrohale.
As the smoking experience continues, the Serie Gran Reserva 1988 continues to showcase equal doses of the chocolate milk powder and cedar flavors on the draw while the mild white pepper is highly consistent through the nose. A touch of piney woodsiness eventually arises beneath the mild pepper in the second half… and that about sums everything up. Unfortunately, both Tut and I’s cigars suffered from multiple relight issues (we lost count) as we were forced to continuously set fire to the foot of the 1988 in order to keep it going.
TNCC FINAL SCORE = 85
The highly consistent flavors were easy enough to enjoy while smoking the Serie Gran Reserva 1988 from Warped Cigars; however, the constant attention that the cigar demanded in regards to keeping the damn thing lit was highly annoying. If we’re going to battle with our cigar, at least make it a more complex, more interesting cigar that’s worthy of our frustrations.
THE BEERS
Once again folks, usually (before the mini apocalypse was thrust upon all of us in 2020) we would carefully – some of you have said “expertly” – pair our evening’s beer with the cigar and movie and we’d all sit around the table and drink that same beer and compare notes. But since the whole COVID-19 shitshow went down, each member of the TNCC is now solely responsible for risking their lives out in the wild and acquiring their own beers for each episode… usually with very interesting results.
TUT’S BEER – ZOMBIE BREAK PAINKILLER by TURNING POINT BREWING
This “tiki-inspired Imperial Sour Ale with coconut, pineapple, passion fruit, and orange” clocks in at 10.9% ABV. That high alcohol content is an important detail to remember as it is perhaps why Tut went from totally hating this sour concoction to declaring it “pretty good” several pints later. Nice flip flop, dude. It’s also worth mentioning that he didn’t detect any of those fruity flavors described by the brewers and the Zombie Break Painkiller was far too overpowering to successfully pair with tonight’s cigar. Nice pairing skills, dude. I suppose the fact that our film does have zombies in it should count for something, so I will factor that in to Tut’s grade below…
TUT’S PAIRING GRADE = D+
THE DOCTOR’S BEER – DALLAS BLONDE ALE by DEEP ELLUM BREWING
This sessional brew’s can features the tagline “Love Runs Deep” which certainly, and disturbingly, applies to the movie we discuss in the second half of our show. Sadly, however, The Doctor offhandedly mentions that he “didn’t purchase this beer due to any movie tie-in” so that lack of forethought and laziness will certainly hurt his score quite a bit. The Doctor’s lackadaisical attitude aside, he did report that this 5.2% beer hailing from the south side of Dallas was quite refreshing and would pair good with pizza. If The Doctor was a pizza he’d be a Sausage Lovers, if you catch my drift…
DOC’S PAIRING GRADE = F
CADE’S 1st BEER – IRISH CREAM TEMPTRESS by LAKEWOOD BREWING
Last year on Episode 159, Tut drank the Salted Caramel Temptress and really liked it so I decided to follow in his stout-loving footsteps this time around. I’m happy to report that the 9.1% Irish Cream Temptress, currently available market-wide, is absolutely delicious! As someone who generally steers clear of stouts in favor of my beloved IPAs, I found this variation of the Temptress full of highly enjoyable, incredibly smooth flavors. And, as you’ll learn from watching/listening to the show below, a milk stout makes the perfect pairing beverage for tonight’s film. No surprise there, I did it again.
CADE’S PAIRING GRADE = A+
CADE’S 2nd BEER – BANGER IMPERIAL IPA by SAINT ARNOLD BREWING COMPANY
“With notes of tropical fruit, melon, and citrus balanced by a soft bitterness and smooth mouthfeel, this imperial hazy IPA is a Banger you’ll come back to again and again.” I’ll be the judge of that. With a low bitterness of 29 IBUs and an ABV of 8.4%, this is an imperial that indeed lives up to its name. It’s also a strong beer that pairs really well with a cigar in that it doesn’t elbow any of the cigar’s flavors out of the way. Tonight’s film features several “horny houseguests” who bang all over the place so…
CADE’S 2nd PAIRING GRADE = A++
THE FIRE PIT
We cover a wide array of topics during tonight’s Fire Pit session including but not limited to:
Fallout (Amazon Prime)
Tracker (CBS)
The Dead Boy Detectives (Netflix)
Late Night With The Devil (Shudder)
Savage Weekend (Amazon Prime)
THE FILM – BURIAL GROUND (1981)
Tubi’s synopsis is one of the more accurate I’ve read recently:
“A splatter classic about a cursed country estate besieged by horny houseguests, and the unusual relationship between a mother and her creepy young son.”
Seems like they kinda buried the lead there, but this synopsis serves as proof – once again – that if you mention horny houseguests in your film description I will eventually watch it. And I like how the synopsis mentioned the country estate being “besieged by horny houseguests” with no mention of the zombies that equally besiege the country estate. It’s almost like the writer knew that nobody would be talking about the zombies in this zombie film when the end credits roll. So let’s get in to Burial Ground shall we?
Also known as “Burial Ground: The Titties Of Terror”, sorry my mistake, that’s “Burial Ground: The Nights of Terror”, the film was written by Piero Regnoli in between other sexy zombie films such as 1980’s Nightmare City and 1982’s Satan’s Baby Doll, the film is directed by Andrea Bianchi whose filmography includes titles like 1972’s What The Peeper Saw, 1975’s Strip Nude For Your Killer, and 1976’s My Father’s Wife… so if you’re seeking out a dream team of Italian filmmakers who are drenched in experience when it comes to zombies and female nudity, these are your dudes. Add in a very cool bonkers electronic score by composers Berto Pisano & Elsio Mancuso and amazing cinematography by Gianfranco Maioletti (who was the special effects camera operator on one of my favorite early creature features 1977’s Tentacles) and there’s no wonder why tonight’s show is a real banger!
Now, in regards to all that “banging”, we here at the TNCC have never witnessed a movie with this extreme level of horny characters and that’s really saying a mouthful. But there’s a twist to all of this horniness, a dark bizarre twist and you’re just going to have to watch or listen to the show below in order to get the full story. But you have been warned, it’s truly fucking crazy.
Finally, Burial Ground is one of the rare films that I firmly believe you have to either absolutely embrace and love it with all your weirdo heart or you’ll just completely dismiss it and piss all over it, there can’t be any in-between… it’s impossible. There is simply no medium ground when it comes to Burial Ground. Don’t believe me? That hurts. Well, just click on the links below to watch or listen to the show and I think you shall!
THE NUB
Sayonara Motherfuckers! Ew… that sounds kinda weird now.
Y’all need to remember that real gangsta-ass podcasters don’t flex nuts ‘cause real gangsta-ass podcasters know they got ’em. Having said that, please leave us comments on the YouTube episode page and subscribe while you’re there, provide us with a review on iTunes, or be a real stud and do both! All these seemingly small gestures would be greatly appreciated as they let us know exactly what you’re thinking about this sweat-soaked tidal wave of hardbodied insanity we like to call The Tuesday Night Cigar Club.
Below is tonight’s full episode for both your viewing and listening pleasure. Thank you for checking out The Tuesday Night Cigar Club and we’ll see you next time when we review another cigar, adult beverage, and film. May the wings of liberty never lose a feather…
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