Episode 153 – The Gardener (2021), Cavalier Genève Ceathair cigar, Beers

It’s our 7th Annual St. Patty’s Day Drinking Bonanza & Then Drinking Ridiculous Amounts More Celebration Extravaganza! Or some crazy bullshit like that...

Happy St. Patty’s Day! Let’s Party!!!

Before we get started tonight I’ve got a bit of BREAKING NEWS to share with everyone. I, Matt A. Cade, chairman-in-chief of The Tuesday Night Cigar Club have just issued a No Fly Zone order for the air space directly above The Corner Of No Hope here in Central Texas. As of this evening at 9pm CST any Russian aircraft that dare fly over The Corner Of No Hope risk seeing me standing outside taking a rockin’ piss while giving their pilots two incredibly passionate middle fingers. You’ve been warned, God bless the Tuesday Night Cigar Club and God bless America!

I don’t have a photo of me giving two middle fingers to the Russians so here’s a pic of Jack Black flipping a double bird salute

Welcome everyone to The Tuesday Night Cigar Club episode 153! It’s our 7th Annual St. Patty’s Day Drinking Bonanza & Then Drinking Ridiculous Amounts More Celebration Extravaganza! Or some crazy bullshit like that. You party people ready to party? Let’s do it!

THE CIGAR – GENÈVE CEATHAIR by CAVALIER CIGARS

Size: 5 x 54 (robusto)
Wrapper: Candela
Binder: Habano
Filler: Honduras, Nicaragua, and Paraguay
Price: $10.49

Ceathair is a candela robusto blended by Sebastien Deccopet specifically for Smokers Abbey in Austin, TX (Tut’s home shop). Ceathair is gaelic for “four” and pays homage to Smoker’s Abbey proprietors Ian & Rebecca’s Irish heritage. They are good people which is clearly evident by how nice and accommodating they are to Tut, repeatedly, which is no easy task.

The Genève Ceathair features a musty aroma when sniffing the light green body, it reminded us of the pages of an old book that hasn’t been removed from the library shelf in years (that’s a fantastic smell in case you were wondering). The cold draw is extremely vegetal and grassy, both Tut and Yak Boy detected some sweetness as well. The aroma pouring from the Genève Ceathair upon torching the foot reminded me of the smell in the air immediately after a string of firecrackers has just exploded. How’s that for odd and specific? There’s a mild/medium white pepper that’s easily detected through the nose and a very faint, light coffee note coming through via the draw. Throughout the first half, a faint woodsy element appears on the retrohale which dances nicely with the consistent pepper and a unique saltiness slowly begins to emerge as well.

In the second half, the strength of the retrohale’s pepper spice elevates to solely medium territory and the salty, light coffee becomes more pronounced on the draw. Once the gold diamond adorning the wrapper leaf begins smoldering, a healthy dose of Nicaraguan mineral appears on the retrohale and it plays very well with the pepper and woodsy note. Construction has been fantastic from start to finish with a smooth draw, straight burn line, strong ash, and it has required zero maintenance whatsoever.

It aint easy being green but the Genève Ceathair is an extremely smooth, mild-to-medium cigar that delivers several flavors that are certainly atypical of most traditional candela offerings. Enjoyable notes of light coffee, woodsiness, and an awesome salt presence are joined by a Nicaraguan twist in the final act where we see an increase in strength and the addition of some mineral which only adds to the stogie’s already enjoyable profile. If all of this sounds good to you ~ which it certainly should ~ get your ass over to the Smoker’s Abbey website, order up a few of these green suckers, and let us know what you think!

TNCC FINAL SCORE = 91

THE BEERS

Once again folks, usually (before the mini apocalypse was thrust upon all of us in 2020) we would carefully – some of you have said “expertly” – pair our evening’s beer with the cigar and movie and we’d all sit around the table and drink that same beer and compare notes. But since this whole COVID-19 shitshow went down, each member of the TNCC is now solely responsible for risking their lives out in the wild and acquiring their own beers for each episode… usually with very mixed results.

CADE’S BEER – SPRUCE WILLIS DOUBLE IPA by DUCLAW BREWING COMPANY

Yippee Ki-Yay Motherfuckers! At 8.1% and 50 IBUs, this pine-forward bad boy might just be the most inspired and impressive pairing that we’ve ever featured on the show in 7 years. It’s ultra green, it’s action movie ready, it’s honestly pure genius from a pairing standpoint. Mango and cantaloupe make up the fruit side of the beer’s profile and those flavors balance the wintergreen aspects of the Spruce Willis quite well. And it’s a delicious, easy drinking IPA that paired extremely well with tonight’s cigar! So all you other cigar-booze pairing mofos can kindly see yourself to the door now, it’s over as this is undeniably the greatest pairing of all time, I win.
CADE’S PAIRING GRADE = A+++

THE DOCTOR’S BEER – SMASH & GRAB IPA by LEGAL DRAFT BEER COMPANY

This single malt, single hop smash IPA reports in for jury duty at 6.1% and 70 IBUs (The Doctor felt this number was a bit high). There was a lemony Palmolive dish soap flavor found on the back end of the Smash & Grab that didn’t agree with The Doctor’s taste buds but he admitted that he might have just not rinsed his pint glass adequately after hand washing it. We suggested that perhaps next time he use his dishwashing machine instead, as he’s been experiencing that lemony dish soap aftertaste in beers a lot lately, and he diagnosed us all as crazy for even suggesting such madness. On a side note, Legal Draft (who name all of their beers based on legal terminology) has contacted me personally about collaborating with them on a new beer called the Hung Jury Milk Stout*. So stay tuned!
THE DOCTOR’S PAIRING GRADE = C-

TUT & YAK BOY’S BEER – GUINNESS

We all love Guinness, everybody loves Guinness. Starting way back in 1759, Guinness deserves all the praise it has ever received and it pairs beautifully with almost every cigar we’ve ever saddled up with it. And this is our massive St. Patty’s Day Drinking Bonanza Shitfaced Extravaganza after all, so both Tut and Yaks (while lazy) get an obligatory A for their pairing grades. If you smoke a cigar that tastes bad with Guinness, you’ve simply got yourself a bad cigar.

THE FILM – THE GARDENER (2021)

Tonight’s screenplay was written by Ben Demaree from a story by Jeff Miller (Miller was an executive producer on the very first Bronzi movie Death Kiss which we featured wayback on Episode 91 as well as Bronzi’s subsequent flicks Once Upon A Time In Deadwood, Escape From Death Block 13 which we discussed a few months ago on Episode 149, Exorcist Vengeance fuck yeah that’s a thing that exists, and our film this evening The Gardener). The Gardener is co-directed by Scott Jeffrey (who you might know from directing the horror movie Clown Doll that we talked about on Episode 140 or perhaps 2021’s The Curse Of Humpty Dumpty) and Rebecca Matthews (who was a producer on Clown Doll and she’s also producing the recently completed Curse Of Humpty Dumpty Part 2: Even Dumpier).

And, of course, The Gardener stars the one and only Robert Bronzi as the titular character. You can listen or watch tonight’s show down below to get our full thoughts on this movie but I’d like to put one thought out there now and film producers please read these next few sentences carefully – You have a potential golden goose in Bronzi that won’t stop shitting cinematic golden eggs IF AND ONLY IF y’all go back to dubbing over his voice with a talented Bronson imitation (I work cheap FYI). Just looking like Charles Bronson isn’t enough anymore, not by a longshot… punks. So did we enjoy this latest Bronzi adventure? Click on the links BELOW and find out!

THE NUB

Please leave us comments on the YouTube episode page and subscribe while you’re there, provide us with a review on iTunes, or be a real stud and do both! All these seemingly small gestures would be greatly appreciated as they let us know exactly what you’re thinking about this sweat-soaked tidal wave of hardbodied insanity we like to call The Tuesday Night Cigar Club.

Drink up motherfuckers!

Below is tonight’s full episode for both your viewing and listening pleasure. Thank you for checking out The Tuesday Night Cigar Club and we’ll see you next time when we review another cigar, adult beverage, and film. May the wings of liberty never lose a feather…

* Legal Draft Beer Company actually hasn’t contacted me regarding a Hung Jury Milk Stout collaboration but they should.

 

 

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TNCC Podcast

Brother of the Leaf, Filmmaker, Prophet, former Mr. South Dakota 1996. I was a bouncer on the child beauty pageant circuit until one too many juice boxes went missing and somebody had to take the fall. I was set up. Ok, I was thirsty. All that hairspray in the air dries out your throat like a motherfu... I apologize to no man. Now I host the Tuesday Night Cigar Club podcast.

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